Last weekend a lovely friend invited me to see West Side Story on Sydney Harbour. “Yes purlease” I said in an instant. It’s my mum’s favourite movie (along with Seven Brides for Seven Brothers) and I have seen it a million trillion times. The clicking fingers, the grimy graffitied streets, the music, the love, the end – I always cry.
As I sat there 5 minutes from the last scene, I began to get anxious and thought ‘please don’t let this happen…please don’t be true’. And as I heard my own thoughts, I had a memory of my sister’s text from a few weeks back ‘I just wish it wasn’t true’. That was in response to something very sad also. More so because it was real, not a story. Oh to have the power to rewind.
This week as I wrote to another friend in a difficult situation I could hear my heart heavily sighing ‘I wish this wasn’t true’.
But unfortunately we cannot rewind, all these things are happening and I will probably spend more of my life saying those words. So what to do? How to cope? I think we can only press play. We just have to carry on, and be carried on by friends and family who love us. Of course the motion will not always be forward, especially at first, and there may be some detours along the way, but eventually forward it will be, with determination.
Be kind, be honest, be authentic. Let people in. Be vulnerable.
My 8yr old daughter helped clarify my thinking this week. After a morning of vomiting I said to her “I wish it was me and not you” and she said “I wish it was no-one”, and then we just sat there and hugged.
I send hugs to all my friends and family (and even strangers) who are struggling right now.
Love Stripes and Trees xxx
Stripes & Trees 