This morning, following an expected dose of tears and tantrums; defiance, disagreements and demands; I took to nature to calm myself and reflect.
Honing into my senses I felt present;
- the smell of cut grass
- the feeling of a nibbling ant
- hearing water lapping on rocks
- tasting salty air
- and spying secretive harbour creatures
I often ask my son to do this technique when he is angry, so I thought I better practice what I preach!
On the way back to collect my children, after they took part in a session painting skateboards (which I what caused the meltdown), I had a newly refreshed energy and outlook, and then I saw this tree trunk. It spoke to me. I instantly read its message.
My family is made up of parts. We are our own beings. My children are not always my children, they are just children, their own beings. But hopefully we have some common and complimentary values and behaviours.
I may think something is good for them, but perhaps it is not.
They may think something is good for them, but perhaps it is not.
What do we do? As I parent do I trump them? I don’t think so, I’d like to think we can come to some arrangement, but, when your child has ADHD and their executive function is one third delayed, I do believe it is my responsibility to guide them, and to suffer the tears and tantrums in the short term, for the long term benefit.
I might be wrong. They might be right.
I might be right. They might be wrong.
This time.
And then next time we will try again. And I might be wrong…or I might be right….
And we will keep on going, again and again and again. Because sometimes, most of the time, they are my children. ❤️
One day I hope that we merge more often and more easily, but for now, as we are all still growing (even the adults), I’m happy to sit next to my family and just be there – whether they are feeling yellow, dark grey, light grey, pink, are circular, long, wonky, flaky…
Our parts may differ at times, but we are the same tree.
Love Stripes and Trees xxx
Ps and thanks to the other parts of my family tree for also being close by…lilac and caramel xx
Stripes & Trees 